This is literally my fourth or fifth time reblogging this.
It’s still hillarious.
One of my favorite lines
I kinda feel like the writers wrote this line specifically to drive the kind of fans who want to figure out how sci-fi tech would theoretically work crazy. They’re like “nope! We’re not going to give you any techno babble to tear apart or investigate or mull over to tell us how we’re doing it wrong, or how it compares in effectiveness to similar tech in other franchises.”
I also feel like this is one of those times when the TARDIS’s translation circuit just gave the fuck up. Like the ‘physics physics physics’ scene, where he is imparting secrets of the universe and the TARDIS is like THERE ARE NO WORDS FOR THIS IN ENGLISH DAMN IT DOCTOR OH HELL FUCK IT.
OH MY GODS she TOTALLY edits his speech. I be he actually swears a fuckton but the TARDIS is like THERE ARE CHILDREN
Once upon a time, there was a fetching young wolverine who, wearing her favorite red hood, went skipping through the fields, on the way to her grandmother’s house, carrying a basket of tasty goodies.*
A wolf, who was lurking at the edge of the woods, descended upon the young wolverine and said “Hello, little red riding wolverine, and where are you going in such a hurry?”
"To visit my grandmother," said the young wolverine, as demure and maidenly as a gravelly wolverine baritone can be.
"To visit your…to…grand…to..my goodness, what big teeth you have…" said the wolf, who seemed to have lost his train of thought somewhere.
The wolverine nodded.
"And what…big…claws…you have…" said the wolf, in much the same tone as General Custer commenting on the surprising number of locals at Little Bighorn.
The wolverine nodded.
"I’ll just bugger off, shall I?" said the wolf.
The wolverine nodded.
The wolf slunk gratefully back into the trees and hyperventilated quietly, and the little red riding wolverine skipped merrily through the woods to her grandmother’s house and they ate assorted rodents and watched cartoons and baked cookies happily ever after. - Ursula Vernon
*Pepperidge Farms’ Mixed Rodent Party Assortment, to be precise, a pretty good value for the money, although everybody always picks through and eats the gerbils first.
Awwww! Thanks, guys!
This woman is right up there on my list of artist/writers I would be happy take out to a really nice pub.
This weekend was devoted to gingerbread. I’ve struggled with rolled cookies quite a bit in the past. Our apartment is kept much too warm in the winter. Thankfully this year I learned a few techniques that help a lot.
Now I just need to practice my pipeing so I can develop a steadier hand.
I got asked to participate in another bake sale/ fundraiser at the CBC so I made meringues again. One batch of orange and one batch of cherry. I found them to be too sweet the last time I made them so I dipped them in a little dark chocolate to balance out the sweetness this time around.
At the end of all this I had eight egg yolks just lying around so I put them to good use in lemon chia seed cupcakes with raspberry filling and vanilla cream cheese frosting.
I dipped Strawberry wafers in white chocolate with matcha powder to make my own strawberry matcha kitkats. I think I could have added a little more matcha powder because they turned out a little too sweet
Surprisingly easy to make although my piping technique isn’t exactly uniform. Still these turned out quite well.
4 egg whites
1/4 tsp salt
1/4 tsp cream of tartar
3/4 cup sugar (ground it a little so it would be finer)
1/4 cup jello crystals
preheat oven to 250
separate egg whites and allow to come to room temperature
beat egg whites until foamy. Add salt and cream of tartar and beat until soft peaks begin to form.
Slowly incorporate the sugar and jello one tablespoon at a time beating well between each addition. Once all sugar has been added beat on high until very stiff peaks form.
Spoon or pipe onto parchment paper lined baking sheets and bake for 35 - 45 min.
Made two types of Florentines yesterday. Pecan with dark chocolate and pistachio with white chocolate. They are a rather finicky cookie when it comes to bake time and during the last few minutes of baking I needed to watch them like a hawk in order to pull them out before they got too crispy.
I also need to practice working with chocolate more. I’d love to do a bit more of refined pattern than the quick crosshatching I ended up doing.
Taste wise they both turned out quite good and the recipe was quite simple and easy to do compared to some Florentine recipes I’ve seen.
1/2 cup pecans, toasted (or other nut of choice)
2 tablespoons old-fashioned rolled oats
6 tablespoons unsalted butter
1/4 cup granulated sugar
1/4 cup brown sugar
2 teaspoons honey
1 tablespoon all-purpose flour (I haven’t tried yet but I bet you could replace the wheat with rice flour for a gluten free option)
1/4 teaspoon coarse salt
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
5 ounces bittersweet chocolate (Or other type of chocolate)
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Pulse together pecans and oats in a food processor until finely ground.
Melt butter in a small saucepan. Add sugars and honey and cook over medium heat, stirring until sugars are melted and mixture is simmering, about 3 minutes. Remove from heat and stir in pecan mixture, flour, salt, and cinnamon. Transfer to a bowl and refrigerate until firm, about 30 minutes.
Mound 2 teaspoonfuls of dough, one on top of the other to form each cookie; place 2 to 3 inches apart on parchment lined baking sheets. Flatten stacked mounds to 1 3/4 inches in diameter. Bake until cookies spread and are golden throughout, 9 to 10 minutes. Let cool completely before removing from baking sheet. Repeat with remaining dough.
Place chocolate in a bowl set over a saucepan of simmering water. Stir until melted; remove from heat. Pour chocolate into a parchment cone or piping bag. Pipe chocolate onto each cookie and let cool completely. Store in air tight container and serve at room temperature.